Thursday, December 16, 2004

Fish Out of Water

This morning, as I was lathering up in the shower, my handy water-resistant Sony shower radio -- tuned to our local "traffic and weather on the 8's" channel, WTOP -- emitted the soothing sounds of Tim Russert's voice. What incisive commentary did he offer about the pressing issues of our day?

Okay, get this: (1) Tim Russert -- a political commentator -- was interviewing (2) Antawn Jamison -- a professional basketball player for the Wizards -- about (3) his predictions of the outcomes of this weekend's football games. What, pray tell, was that combination of disparate talents supposed to generate in the way of insight? Not much. It may as well have been, (1) Tim Russert interviewing (2) me, (3) about the latest developments in quantum physics.

I hadn't had my coffee yet, so I cursed, threw the radio against the wall, and after drying off, gave my dog a swift kick in the abdomen.

Of course, WTOP does crap like that all the time. Usually, the Wizards segment is recorded by a man named Arch (Campbell). He, as far as I can tell, has no expertise in anything, and he interviews Wizards about things they know even less about. Most often, he asks them for movie recommendations. How about getting me some valuable advice on mortgage-backed securities, while you're at it, Arch? Maybe the Wizards can even help me fill Russert in on the implications of the Copenhagen Interpretation on Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle.

Why does everyone have an opinion on everything? And why should I care about what Antawn Jamison thinks, unless it's an opinion on the triangle offense? I can't think of a single reason. So, my dog gets a swift kick almost every morning. I really should change the channel.

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes you must change it. To what? Well I usually do NPR through the night, by 7 am I am either listening to that or C-SPAN radio 90.1 fm, from 8 - 9: Democracy Now on 89.3 fm. This norning though I went to 1120 am. There is a great broadcast from France from 7-9; then it goes to Chinese radio.

As to the safety of the dog...NPR is questionable. Democracy Now is great (though the horrible news might put your dog in the line of fire). C-SPAN radio is definetly dangerous: no matter your position the fools who get on the radio will no doubt cause violence. 1120 is more interesting than anything. (Do you understand french? If not the Chinese show is in english).

10:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Democracy Now should be renamed Communists Today. I find the host to be a bit shrill. NPR is probably the way to go.

As for Arch Campell on the Wizards, how the hell does that guy have a gig doing anything. He is weird-looking and talentless, basically a poor man's Gene Shalit. His reviews of movies are infrequent and useless. He is probably more qualified to ask Wizards players dumb questions than to pass himself off as a movie critic.

11:38 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Democracy Now is the only reason to listen to the radio in the morning.

2:45 PM  
Blogger Joseph K said...

I admit was Anonymous post #2. Democracy Now feeds the beast for far lefties, but I find Amy Goodman and her guests to be manic, defensive and conspiratorial.

8:01 PM  

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