Well, Well

So, it had to happen at some point. I was dispatched to buy "feminine products." I got to the store and wanted to be quick. But, I was given very specific instructions. I was to buy a very specific product. And, it wasn't clear to me where it was. I didn't want to be seen in "that aisle." I wanted to get in and out before someone else saw me.

Then, another dude showed up. Shame. But, he was not looking where I was. He was buying yeast infection shit, a bit up from me. He looked at me. As he put the vagistat in his basket, I shook my head. Punk.

More Partridge

His message is universal...

Key Endorsement

The Osmonds back Mitt Romney. She's a little bit country. He's a little bit rock and roll. They chose polka.

Thank God Thomas Midgley Is Dead

As the inventor behind leaded gasoline and Freon, he might be singlely responsible for the majority of the the damage to the ozone layer.

President Huck-a-le-bee

He's up by six points in Mayberry. When voters are asked about a Huckleberry/Quickdraw Mcgraw ticket, the lead grows to nine points, outside the poll's margin of error. Food for thought.

Men Are From Mars

The simple fact is that instead of completing the last batch of Save-The-Date cards on my own, I chose instead to sweep my garage and to fix a toilet in my house. A does not understand why; when she asked me, I said, "Well duh." Discuss.

Alan Partridge

For a while, I was turned off by all things British. It came after watching a Thompson Twins video and being put off. I couldn't decide what was worse, the fact that they didn't look alike (ranging from pasty white to black) or that there were three of them. What kind of sick fucking joke was this?

Alan Partridge got me back into the Brits. Maybe because I see a lot of myself in him even thoughI am not a 50 year old white guy.